Today I have a dilemma. It has something to do with a cot. Now I know that cot speak is not everyone's cup of tea, but although the subject of my dilemma is about a cot, I can sense some underlying issues which affect us all. Issues like guilt and broken promises. You see, some time ago I made a promise to a friend and due to circumstances beyond my control, I have yet to fulfil this promise. Every day it eats away at me until I feel sensations which vary between mild annoyance and extreme guilt. And until I fulfil this promise I won't be able to rest easy.
I shall explain. Last Summer some good friends of ours were moving from Brighton to Seattle. I try not to think of this too often because I still miss them and it makes me sad. And although they are still my e-mail, Skype and Facebook friends, it's just nowhere near as fun as popping round for a chat and a coffee and a good old heart to heart. Anyway, when these friends left the country they spent a month or so ridding themselves of furniture, clothes and all sorts of knick knacks and paraphenalia that they couldn't take with them on their epic emigration. I enjoyed this time immensely as I measured up spaces for fridges we didn't really need but quite fancied, tables and mirrors which one day would be sure to come in handy, a pair of Lelli Kelli children's shoes (which incidentally Jane are still worn every day), and my absolute favourite, the entire contents of their food cupboard and alcohol supplies. We really were vultures and I loved every minute of it. But back to the point. One of the items we managed to aquire during this time was a fantastic children's bed. It's not a bunk bed, but a higher than normal bed - the sort with three steps up to the sleeping area and space to play underneath. It was the sort of bed that I'd wanted to buy Renée when she had graduated from a cot but my maternal instincts got the better of me and I'd opted for something slightly safer and low to the ground. But last Summer, just before her 4th birthday I decided that the time was right for a really big girl's bed. So we swapped her low-to-the-ground singleton for this new aquisition and she was a happy little thing. So where does the guilt come in? Read on please...
We decided that instead of dismantling the original single bed we would just move it into Edie's room because although she was still in her cot it wouldn't be long until she too would graduate to something bigger. There's nothing like a good old hand me down for a younger sibling! So that's what we did. And from the first moment Edie saw it in her room she said 'Edie's bed. Me want go Edie's bed.' I resisted at first because a cot to bed transition is not always a smooth one and I do try to make things easy for myself. Anyway, during this time of resistance I was chatting with a very heavily pregnant friend. 'You don't have a cot for the new baby?' I asked. 'Oh, well you can have Edie's. We won't be needing it soon. She's got Renée's old bed and it's a really good quality cot. You're very welcome to it.' My friend was over the moon and happily accepted it. But this is where the guilt comes in. This conversation took place back in August and the very next day my friend gave birth to a beautiful little boy. It was as though she had been holding on to the baby until she felt safe that he had somewhere to rest. And as soon as I had promised the resting place, bob's your uncle, baby's born. So what's the problem?
The problem, my dear friends, is that Edie is still happily snuggled in her cot every single night. And although I try to introduce her to the pleasures of a big grown up girl's bed, she is stubborn to the end. Despite the early signs of wanting to graduate to the bed, she is no nearer doing it than she was back in August. And the worst is yet to come - my friend's baby is sleeping in his pushchair every night and he's 6 months old. So please help me out. What can I do? I have explained to my friend that Edie will not, under any circumstances, relinquish her cot, and perhaps it's best to look around for another one, but my friend just says that she's happy to wait. Aaarghh. I'm sure in time Edie will decide that her bed is a better bet than her cot, but it's not time that we have. Any suggestions would be hugely appreciated.
hayley balozi posted a blog post
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