She's just not ready!

Why is it that Edie wholeheartedly refuses to be potty-trained? Could it be that she actually likes the feeling of being warm and wet and ever-so slightly smelly? Does she delight in having a hard piece of poo squidged right in between her bottom cheeks? Does it make her giggle and laugh that she's the one in control and not I? Or is it that she's just a lazy little monkey and can't be bothered to apply herself? Well if she's anything like her Mother, then the answers right there (the lazy part...please!!) Or worse still, could it be that she is ready and I am not?

But this is the thing. Regardless of the reasons behind it all, I have to say that I'm beginning to get a little embarrassed. It's been there for a while, but these feelings of having to justify her love of nappies surfaced again yesterday after a comment made by another Mother (always the way). But it wasn't rude. It wasn't even malicious. All it was, was this.

"So, Edie...when is Mummy going to put you in big girl panties then?"

I couldn't help but go red, as much as I tried not to. And the more I tried to contain it, the worse it got until before I knew it I was having a full-on hot flush and looking for the nearest exit whilst spluttering something along the lines of,

"Well, we...we... have tried. She just refuses to do it. I just don't think....well, I just don't think that she's quite....er...ready yet."

At which point I got even more embarrassed at the rather lame excuses and had to scuttle away, clutching a rather large nappy-clad Edie.

Edie's a big girl, you see, so I suppose she looks older than she is (which is almost two-and-a-half in case you were wondering). She could pass for 3, as long as she doesn't open her mouth...Oh bless you Edie. I love you and I love everything about you.

But when I compare her to her sister (something which I know I shouldn't do but I can't help myself), I just don't remember having any such problems. The Grandparents, of course, urged me to put Renée on the potty before she was 2, but I knew she wasn't ready. Apart from running away and hiding each time the potty was 'subtley' produced, we were due to move house and have a new baby, so I thought it was best to leave it. And I was right. By two-and-a-half, with a new baby sister and an even newer house, she was out of nappies, day and night. There were a few accidents, of course, but only when she was particularly tired or engrossed in something. But the bottom line was, she knew what to do.

With Edie it's not quite the same. Believe me, I have tried. We've had days of wearing pants; pants which become sodden every 20 minutes or so, such is her lack of bladder control. We've had wee wees (or 'pee pees' as we call them) on the potty and subsequent star charts, but two minutes later, after much cadjoling and reminding, there'll be a pee pee on the floor and a poo poo (or 'caca') on the stairs.

And then I think, well is it me? Maybe she is ready and I'm the one who's not. So when I woke up this morning I thought 'This is it. Today's the day. No nappies. I'm just going to deal with the pain that is wet, soggy, smelly pants. I'm going to persevere until she's well and truly out of nappies.' And do you know what? She produced a pee-pee on the potty, we danced around in delight, we put a gold sticker on her chart and then dressed her in pants and trousers. Ten minutes later, pee pee everywhere. None in the potty. Not even near it. No mention of the fact that she had even needed it, or that she was soaking wet. I just happened to notice a rather dark stain on her trousers.

Ok, deep breaths. I wasn't going to throw in the towel just yet. New pants. New trousers. Another explanation of what to do should she feel the 'urge'.

Then a dilemna. Husband wants to take her for a bike ride along the seafront. "Can we put a nappy on her?" He asks.

"No", I reply. "This is it. She's going to learn. She's just done a pee pee (albeit in her pants), so she should be ok for a while. And if she does have an accident, then take some spare clothes and change her."

So that was that. Deep breaths again. Fingers crossed and a little conversation before departure that went something like this.

"Edie - if you need a pee pee, you must tell Papa."
"Ok Mummy. I know."
"Do you need a pee pee now?"
"No Mummy."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes Mummy."
"And if you need a pee pee, what do you do?"
"I tell Papa."
"That's right darling. Good girl."

And before she's even on the bike, pee pee. Everywhere.

Aaargh.

So this is it. I just don't think she's ready. I'm ready. But she's not. It's as simple as that. I know that she'll 'get it' eventually, I just wish she'd hurry up. There are only so many times I can justify it before I shout at someone, red-faced and temperature rising.

"SHE'S JUST NOT READY. NOW LEAVE ME ALONE."