Tuesday, 18 August 2009

What's in your bag?

So I took the girls to a 5-year-old's birthday party yesterday and, as is the norm for children's parties, there were rather a lot of sweeties. Sweeties inside wrappers for Pass the Parcel, sweeties in a bowl as consolation prizes for not winning Musical Statues, sweeties in a bowl as prizes for winning Musical Statues, sweeties as part of the party tea, sweeties in the going home bags. You get the picture. Lots of sweeties. Now I'm not against giving sweeties to children. Far from it, in fact - I'm a huge fan. What I'm not a fan of though is five lolipops in the mouth at any one time, plus a packet of chocolate buttons in one hand and a Milky Way in the other. It's just not a good look. So just as the sweetie situation was about to get out of hand, I swiped the one's they'd 'won', put them in my bag and saved them for later on.

All fine.

That was until later on came and Renée called to me from another room.

'Mummy, what did you do with my lolipops?'

'They're in my bag darling. You can take one if you like.' I figured one would be ok.

Thing is, she couldn't find them.

'Where Mummy?' She called again.

'In my handbag.' I was loath to actually get up from the sofa because it was the first time I'd sat down all day.

'Found them Mummy'.

And that was that.

Except of course it wasn't.

When I later decided to make my way from the sofa to the kitchen, I just so happened to pass by the contents of my bag, in the hallway, strewn everywhere. And I mean everywhere.

I was most displeased.

But as I searched through the contents I remembered a post I had once read, quite a while ago, about the contents of another blogger's handbag. I can't recall who it was, but I do remember thinking what a hilarious post it was and if only I had the energy to empty my bag and go through the contents I could leave a funny comment detailing what I had found in the deepest depths. But I'd never had the energy. Until yesterday when I had absolutely no choice in the matter. But, I thought, I won't get cross with Renée (well not very). Instead I'll make a blog post out of it.

So this is it. The contents of my bag.

7 pens. Only 3 of them working
4 round wooden beads
1 square wooden bead
1 squashed Milky Way
3 hair clips
1 apple stalk
1 child's wooden watch bracelet
2 pieces of red string
1 pink notepad (with only child's scribbles inside)
1 Smint packet
1 eye hospital referral letter
1 hotel room key (whoops - sorry Butlins)
1 plastic harmonica
1 purse (and I won't even tell you the contents of that or else we really would be here all night)
4 cheque books
1 business card for a dog walking company (I do not have a dog)
2 lolipop sweetie wrappers
2 very manky raisins
1 tooth pick with a pirate flag at the end (!)
1 screwed up shopping list
3 random receipts
1 Hello Kitty transfer
1 Nurofen tablets instruction leaflet

No wonder poor Renée couldn't find her lolipops amongst all that. I never realised I was quite such a hoarder.

So that is that. But the question remains. What, oh what is inside your bag? You'll be surprised, I'm sure.


  1. How Random, especially the dog walking business card? I like how you collect half eaten snacks from the girls, that's probably what is festering in the bottom of my bag, but to be honest i'm too scared to look :)

  2. So that is where my Hello Kitty transfer is you thief.;-)

  3. I think I'd draw the line at the apple core but I'm always putting little bits of rubbish and leftovers from the children into my bag ready to throw away when we get home.Yeah right!
    What I'd like to know is, did you put it ALL back in the bag? ;0)

  4. Ahhhh fantastic. I have the smints, the sweets, kids crayons, purse, notebook avec scribbles, sweet wrappers, a few loose fruit flakes, plasters, a twenty pence piece, make up, hair bobbles, phone, and wait for it, a leaflet for Stannah Syair kifts courtesy of Miss M, some paracetamol and M's Barbie Sunglasses. Nice. :D

  5. I only carry round a baby change bag right now and long for an actual real handbag full of hoarded mystery items! Sob.

    I'm not even gonna begin to detail what's in the change bag, we'd be here for eternity.


  6. Oh my fave is the manky rasins!

    I'm always amazed at the number of packs of gum and the amount of change that collects at the bottom of my wee bag. No wonder they get so heavy!

  7. I have like TEN tampons in my bag ... and I've been pregnant for the last nine months, LOL. I don't know why I'm still carrying them around - they're just taking up space! :)

  8. That's, um, a lot of stuff! I'm not sure I even want to know what's in my handbag. In certain parts there are sticky bits of food that make me not even want to put my hand in there. Ewww.

  9. Now for someone like me (who is a teeny weeny bit obsessive about clearing out her handbag EVERY DAY - i know, v sad and boring and a tad mental) reading that list completely scrambled my brain (altho i can totally see how it would happen as after just one day there are usually all sorts of delights in mine) , but did really make me laugh at the random items! i am also desperate to come over and sort your bag out! I am wondering what happened next... did you just shove it all back in again and forget about it??!

  10. I daredn't look. I do know that I have a spare nappy (no children in nappies any more), at least 4 different toy cars, some childrens cereal bars, which as I can't buy them here means they have been bashed about for over a year, a lot of receipts and the tickets that car parks give you, and more than 2 manky raisins.

    Did Renee find her lollipops in the end?

  11. I've lost the man bag for the moment, only used, and packed specifically, for special occasions. However I do find surfaces at home become my dumping place for stuff that would presumably end up in my bag, if I had one.

  12. I have nappies, wipes and a plastic squirrel. Then I stopped looking, because that's a bad enough start.

  13. Ah! this would be a great meme! Like you, I can't quite get the energy up to go and find my bag but I know it wouldn't be good! I do know, though, that my favourite stone, which I kept in the front pocket, is missing!

  14. Funny post! Love the dog walking card. I restrain myself to a tiny handbag which just has a lipbalm, a lip gloss, home keys, work keys, hairbrush, purse and tissues in....

    ... however I do have a big bag that I used to use when I worked full time (only left four years ago lol) and that's too terrifying to even peek into!!!!!!

    Mel xxx

  15. I love the tooth pick with a pirates flag!!

  16. Oh my! That's a muggers' paradise, lol. I thought I carted a lot of stuff round with me but no where near as much as you!! Hope the lollipops were worth the hunt.

    CJ xx

  17. It was MTJAM, I'm pretty sure, who did the bag thing originally. My bag is so small that you can't fit anything extra in it - purse, two spare small canvass bags, post-it pad in main compartment, inhaler and emergency medicines and creams in a zipped compartment within that, make-up in the back pocket, mobile phone in the front pocket, tissues and... hmm, leaves, pine cones, sticks, sweet wrappings, centimes... in the in between pocket. If I had my old bag there would be a helluva lot more!

    (And for some reason I thought Renee was going to find a condom in there when I started reading the post - sorry, don't know why that sprung to mind; perhaps the gay porn post?)

  18. wow thats a lot of stuff! It was MTJAM that did that post a while ago i LOVE the whats in my bag game, i have just cleared mine out too i feel a post coming on! xxxx

  19. Good job she didn't find a tampon and think it was a sugar mouse.

  20. WoB - I know - very random aren't they? My Mother read the post and said that the contents were far too boring and I should have made up some funny items. Didn't even think of it! Silly me...

    Charlotte - No no no - it was from her party...Promise! But I bet you've got one in your bag too - just the sort of thing you'd have!

    Chic Mama - No no - it was an apple stalk, not a core, thankfully. I'm really not quite that dirty and disgusting (despite evidence to the contrary)! And, no I didn't put it all back! Threw most of it away and now I can't believe how light my bag is!

    Jo - Ha ha. Now that's more like it - Stannar Stair Lift leaflet - I knew I should have made up some items - think my bag was decidedly dull. Did Miss M pick it up at the doctor's surgery? Just the sort of thing Renée would do...

    Insomniac - Would you believe I never had a changing bag?! Even when my girlies were babies - I carried everything around in my handbag. Obviously I never had what I needed! But I was surprised there wasn't anything properly baby-related there like a left-over nappy or a nappy sack or wipes even. Odd mixture.

  21. Modern Mom - Yep the manky raisins were a delight. And I'm gobsmacked there wasn't any lose change at the bottom of the bag - I must have gone through it at some stage when I was broke - not even 1 penny - how awful is that?

    Rita - Yeah I was totally surprised not to have a tampon in there - I could have sworn there'd be some - must be a hole or something! Maybe I tried tidying at some point...tampons get all manky at the bottom of the bag don't they - they come out of their wrappers and then attract dirt. Not very pleasant at all.

    Lady Mama - I now - I can not believe how much stuff was in there - and it's not even a very big bag. Having said that, I have since tidied it up and it is now much lighter!

    Elsie - Ooh every day - now that is organised of you!! Having said that, I'm a bit of a clean freak, so I'm totally surprised at myself. I think i must be one of those people who tidy up only to stuff it all behind a cupboard door. It looks good, but when you open it up, everythng falls on top of you!! But fret not darling - unscramble your brain - I have emptied my bag and it is now offically clutter free, tidy and very much lighter!

    BiB - I know - I was totally surprised not to have any nappies or nappy sacks in there (despite being finished with nappies). Ooh I like the sound of that. I might even say it again. Despite being finished with nappies. Yay!!! I say it loud and proud. Whoops, sorry - got a bit carried away there. But yes, no nappies or cereal bars. Very surprising indeed. And not even a 5 pence piece :-((

  22. SPD - So where do you put all you 'stuff' when you go out? Like your keys, or your wallet or Max's drink or little toys?? Do you have very large pockets? I think I have OCD about cluttered surfaces - but now I know where it all goes - my surfaces may be uncluttered, but my handbag is a right old tip...

    Mwa - Ha ha. Love the plastic squirrel. And I'm sure there would have been plenty more exciting things in there...

    Suburbia - Oops...Oh no - where is your stone?? I'm all sad about it... Search lady, search...Go get your bag now!!

    Shabby - Ooh you are good - I always think I can get away with a small bag but then keep adding to it and before I've even left the house I have items sticking out at odd angles and I know I need to get a bigger bag. Hmph. Just can't do small!

    New Mummy - Yeah that was from the end of term Pirates Party that Renée had at her school. We all went down to the beach and had a prate picnic and one of the otehr Mums (much more helpful than me who had only brought food for her child and her child alone) managed to bake cupcakes for everyone and had stuck a tooth pick with a pirate flag in the top. Had no idea it was still there!

  23. CJ - I know - imagine how disappointed a mugger would have been with their haul - not even a penny piece to show...And yes, she found the lilipops and they kept her quiet for at least 5 minutes, so it was almost worth it!

    Tasha - Yes it was MTJAM - you're right. I remember now - and I think someone else did it too...I remember seeing it a couple of times. It's funny - you don't think you've got much in your bag, but it always just keeps on going...love the pine cones! Condoms!! Ha ha... not in my bag! But wish there had been something a bit more exciting...

    Amy - Yep Tasha says it was MTJAM too - and now you've both said it I remember. was very funny. Can't remember what she had int here, but her items were much better than mine. CAn't wait to see what's in yours...I shall cut and paste my contents for your comments section!

    Maddie - Oh now that would have been hilarious! Think she knows what tampons are now though...actually she calls them mice...when she sees their long tails dangling!! Oops, bit TMI there!