Completely and utterly.
I knew my life would never be the same again.
And I was right.
I was 19 years old.
But it was nothing to do with a man. Or even a boy. Well, ok maybe it was just a little bit, but for the purposes of this post, it wasn't.
It was a country.
I loved it. I loved the people, the food, the climate, the hapiness that it gave to me so easily.
In those days I think I had a permanent smile etched on my face.
And sometimes when I'm sad and exhausted and overwhelmed by my present day life, I like to remember those times. I like to think that maybe one day I can feel like that again. If only for a moment.
So, it was only natural, given the past few months, that I would want to come back.
So here I am again. Seventeen years after I first arrived and 15 years since I was last here. Looking for just a little bit of that happiness.
And do you know what?
I think I've found it.
Back then I fancied myself as a bit of a philosopher. Still do, but shhhhhh, don't tell anyone. At 19 you can get away with it. At almost 36, you can't.
So if I say I wrote the following when I was 19, maybe you can forgive me, just a little bit.
You will always love the place where you learnt about life
Because you'll never believe anywhere else can offer you such riches
And understanding life being one of the world's greatest riches.
But what you have to understand is that you can never stop learning.
So don't be fooled into thinking that there's only one place for you.
The key to understanding is that you can never understand everything.
So expect everyhting, but wait for nothing.
Because if you wait it will never come.
Thailand, I still love you. Thank you for making me feel happy again. I owe you one.